I'm Not Talking to Myself - My Characters are Talking

     How many of you have had that conversation lately? Neighbors, family and coworkers don't quite know what to think of us when we writers talk out our dialogues in a low (or not-so-low) voice with no one else around. I actually have a friend who had a security guard ask her manager if she was all right. Talk about busted!

     The truth of the matter is that (no matter how embarrassing it can be to have someone laugh at you for "talking to yourself") we writers have to talk out our dialogue. There's just no way around it.

     Why, a non-writer might ask? It makes perfect sense if you consider what goes into writing.

     When a writer sits down to a blank screen, there is an automatic "FREEZE!" moment. They suddenly can't think of a thing to write. So they think and plot and plan a little, then come back and sit down again. With first sentences, this is pretty easy. With dialogue, not so much. Why? Because narrative is easy to write. It's like writing in a journal, or blogging, or Twittering. It's basically typing out your thoughts. No editing is really needed as you go to make it sound natural (most of the time). Dialogue, on the other hand, isn't something you can always write naturally because all conversations with more than one person (you and yourself don't count) happen out loud, not inside our heads.

     This means that when you're writing dialogue, you can't just depend on what you hear inside your head. You have to hear it out loud to know whether or not it sounds right. You have to hear it to know if people would really say things like that. "The ear is the best writer" is the saying - and it is completely right when it comes to dialogue!

     Think of it this way:

     You love fudge; you've eaten lots of fudge; you've made lots of fudge. But you've never tried Lemon Bar Fudge. Now, you can read the recipe all you want. You can think about how delicious it's going to be. You can even pin pictures of it onto your favorite Pinterest board. But you will never know what it tastes like unless you actually put a bite into your mouth.

     The same is true of dialogue. You can read it. You can plan it. You can even write it down. But until you hear it spoken out loud, you will never know if it SOUNDS right.

     So for those of you who are hiding behind bedroom doors, cowering in the basement study, covering up your conversations with the noise of a hot shower, I would say this - rehearsing dialogue is nothing to be ashamed of. A little unusual for non-writers to see, but not at all unusual for a writer to do. The next time somebody gives you that look and asks, "Who are you talking to?" just give them a lecture on the subject of how to properly test dialogue. And I guarantee you, they may think you're crazy, but they won't ask about it again.

     Sincerely,

          Yours Truly

LIFE: What Having a Child Will Do For Your Writing

      A lot of people make a big deal about how having children will change your life. "You'll never get to go anywhere fun!" "You'll never be able to afford it!" "You'll ruin your figure, not to mention your life!" Oh, and my personal favorite - "Just forget about romance after this!" People make a big deal about almost any major event in your life (and theirs). As if the world is coming to an end just because you have to plan your life more carefully or work out more diligently. But what they tend to forget is that you can turn almost anything to your advantage as a writer. And major life experiences are no exception.

     No, this is not a blog post on how having my daughter has been one of the best things that has ever happened to me. Nor it is a blog post on the many ways she actually has changed my life. (For the record - the romance only leaves if you let it. Just sayin'.) This post is going to be about how life-changing events, like having a child, can actually improve your writing on a level nothing else can.

     How? Here are three important ways.

     1) It makes you think about priorities. This may sound daunting and undoubtedly cliched, but any change in your life that starts to cause inconveniences (from missing Mom's old coffee maker to waking up at 3:30 a.m. to a baby's cries) will make you rethink what's important in your life. Our lives only have so much room despite our efforts to cram everything in. Which means that we have to decide what is important enough to make time to do and what isn't. As harsh as it sounds, if the one thing you don't have time or energy or inspiration for is writing, then it's time to let it go temporarily. If you find yourself spiraling downward without it, it means you're still a writer at heart. If you find your life is simply that much better without it - it means you're not really a writer at heart and you need to focus on those passions you were created for.

     2) It gives you fuel for your stories. The more experiences you are exposed to, the more you will have to write about. I haven't had that much happen to me throughout my life compared to most people, certainly not many big life changes. (Either that, or I just didn't realize that they were big life changes at the time.) So for years I have struggled with the phrase "write what you know". If I was supposed to write about only my life experiences, then my book was going to be awfully boring! (More on that phrase in a later post...) Now that I've had more happen to me (marriage, moving away from family, having a baby), I not only feel like I have actually had something happen in my life - I have SO much more to write about! I now have a huge increase in story material from my own life that I can write about expertly because (duh!) it happened to me. And that leads to the most important way a life changing event helps a writer...

   3) It allows a writer to sympathize with the characters. Most of my stories growing up were about people older than me, in different circumstances than me, dealing with a lot of things I could only imagine I knew about. And it made for pretty unconvincing story lines, not because I hadn't done my research, but because I had no source for emotional connection with my characters. I had never been separated from a loved one, so I couldn't properly relate how a girl would feel if the love of her life got sent off to war. I had never had a child, so I couldn't properly relate how a parent would feel about watching a child have to go through something difficult. I had never been through surgery, so I couldn't properly relate how a person would feel having to deal with rehab. Now that I have experienced all these major life events, I can write as though I understand what a character is going through even if their particular life experiences are slightly different than mine. Why? Because I have been through similar situations, if not identical ones (I'm pretty sure no one has ever carried around a magic ring and had to dump it in a volcanic mountain before). And while before the reactions I came up with were noble and brave and idealistic, I can now write reactions that are more realistic. People are people. They don't always react like they should. And having been through some "stuff" myself, I can now understand why they don't. It makes for better plot lines, more lifelike characters, and reactions people can believe.

     Does all this mean that writing is made any easier having a child around? Or living in a new area where you don't know anyone? Or dealing with a physical condition that takes up a lot of your time? Absolutely not! But easier isn't always better. Just ask my post-pregnancy-work-out-sore abs - sometimes you have to endure pain to build muscle. So don't complain about the inconvenience of life experiences. Start using them!

     Sincerely,

            Yours Truly

Guess Who's Back? (And Bringing Company)

     Wow. Having a kid in your life will do all kinds of crazy things to your writing! But not necessarily bad things. Later this weekend, I'll be publishing a post about how all of this "non-writing time" has affected my writing and what I've drawn from it - and, hopefully, some other, fun posts, too!

      For now, let me share with you some food for thought: a vlog (video blog) by Nosco Says in which my big brother discusses weak, underdeveloped villains - and when you can afford to get away with using them. Although drawn from films, this vlog certainly applies to writers. I myself was convicted of falling prey to the kind of cheap writing Nosco points out.

Guardians of the Galaxy Vs. Big Hero 6

     Please enjoy and share with your writer friends!

     Sincerely,

           Yours Truly